No. More. Drama. No more. Take a good, hard look at the faces in this video.Take time to listen to what Mary J. Blige is truly saying: "It feels so good when you let go, avoid these drama in your life. Free from all the game, free from all the stress." If you want to see the physical act of letting go of drama, check out MJB's performance at the 2002 Grammy's here. The pain on her face & that she exhibits in her movements is real. I am reduced to a pile of goosebumps & tears each time I watch it.
What the hell has this world come to that we need the government to step in to our lives by creating legislation against bullying?! Are we all that ignorant that we honestly don't know how to treat each other?! WTF, people?! Just because someone is different than me, has different viewpoints or beliefs does not give me any right to harm them with my words, hands, or actions. This world would be beyond boring if we were all damn clones...
Gossip & rumors. Now, I know this shit has been around for centuries. Doesn't make it right. And at one point or another we have all been the victim of gossip, rumors, & bullying just as we have also perpetuated them. Have you ever purposely done something hurtful to someone? Said hateful things in a moment of rage? Even to convey your own feelings at their actions? I have. And to think of them now makes me sick. I am not by any stretch dismissing my anger or hurt, but I'll get to that in a minute. It's the words & the way I chose to make my feelings known that make me hang my head in shame. In recent history, I have used words like "cunt" (which, if you know me in the least you know I HATE that word, yet I used it anyway), "loser", & "worthless" in arguments. Why? Saying them didn't make me feel any better; those words didn't reduce my hurt. But they reduced me. Instead of lowering myself to hateful words, labels, & slang I should have admitted my hurt & pain so we could both learn from it. No matter the outcome.
Now, back to dismissing feelings. It's OK to be angry. Sad. Hurt. Fucking pissed off at someone's actions toward you. Feelings, good or bad, let us know we are alive. And that we care. If we didn't care, we wouldn't be so easily hurt by others & there would be no reason for this post. It's taken me a long time to realize that I have a choice; we all have this choice: We can hang on to that hurt & pain, or we can let it go. Release it. In a recent conversation a friend told me "forgiveness is freeing for you". Forgiveness is a BIG DEAL for me. Always has been. I struggle with the notion that if we forgive, we are providing a free pass for whatever it is we've forgiven. So while I'm not sure what I think about his words, I understand what he means. By holding on to that which begs forgiveness, & the anger/pain/hurt that goes with it, you allow it to live within you. To grow like a cancer within, & have power over, you. YOU allow drama to control your life. What good does it do any of us to hold on to something hurtful someone said or did years ago? Or even yesterday? It doesn't. It just takes up valuable space in our hearts, minds, & souls that could be occupied by so many more beautiful things.
I found this:
And it speaks to me on so many levels. Look at the chains circling those hands --- the hands are struggling to break free of them! Is that really how any of us want to live? Struggling against something we could easily free ourselves from?! I love the word "grace". Until I can resolve my own issues with the word "forgiveness", I think I will use "grace" in its place. I look at it this way: By sharing my grace with those who have hurt me I am freeing myself from the heavy chains surrounding my heart, but I am also freeing them. They are free to make changes, be better to others in their lives. Even if we never see or speak to each other again, I will know I have loved someone enough to give them a second chance at their life. And I pray those I have hurt will share their grace with me as well.
By giving, & hopefully receiving, grace we can all reduce the drama in our lives. We can all play a part in creating a community in which people are accepted & respected. No more bullying. No more gossip. No more rumors. No more hate.
No more drama.
